Count Your Lucky Stars

Growing up I guess we didn’t have much in the way of possessions but no one in the neighborhood had a lot of excess and it’s just how things were in the olden days.

Graduating from college I landed a good job and was able to start to get some nice things otherwise known as “stuff.” I didn’t buy the most expensive but only the things that work best for me.

Traveling around the country, nowadays, I notice a lot of advertisements for “the best” of about everything you can imagine. One for “The Best Doctors in Dallas” caught my eye and Ol' Dutch got to wondering just what kind of guarantee or proof they had to substantiate that claim.

I mean if you get your gall bladder out and don't like the results will they put it back in for you? How do I know they are “the best?” Is there some kind of Besting Board that passes out a certification for that?

Everywhere I turn, businesses, schools and even towns all seem to be in a competition to get your money, your kids or your citizenship.

On a trip to California I found the “best avocados,” the “juiciest watermelons,” the “freshest fish,” and “home of the most beautiful women.”

And, there is always someone who says they have the best prices around and will match anyone's price.

The last truck Ol' Dutch bought was just such a deal. I had the deal in hand and was going to pick it up the next day when a dealer about 80 miles away called me and offered to match the price. He said I should come over there because “we are the best dealer in Texas.” I asked him what kind of guarantee he had on that and I could tell that question didn't have an answer in his playbook.

Ol' Dutch has been thinking of settling down and these guarantees by the different towns are starting to catch my eye. Being older now and having Trixie along as a sidekick, I figure it’s about time that I start getting the “best of living” and towns are the first place to start.

I have found the “best small town,” “the friendliest town,” “best place to raise kids town,” “lowest crime rate town” and 5,322 towns that are listed in the top 10 of towns to live in depending on which website you visit.

This week, I’m checking on these town to see what kind of guarantee they offer if I move there and find out there is maybe a better, friendlier, or place with lower crime out there.

Will my getting a refund require some kind of testimonial from Aunt Bee or Opie stating that the new town I find is actually nicer? Will there be a lawsuit as the two towns fight over bragging rights to that title?

No matter what happens, at least I am will be in an area that thinks they are “the best” and therein is half the battle to the top. Which got me to thinking or what Trixie calls “dangerous.”

I already know I have the “best girlfriend” around and the “best dog” so that must mean Ol' Dutch himself is pretty darn special and surely the “best” at something to attract just such a gathering of admirers? Or maybe it’s as Trixie says, “count your lucky stars.”

That statement from Trixie at least got Ol Dutch down to the local store for a lottery ticket but I have yet to be able to determine which stars up there are my lucky ones and it’s darn cold sitting outside at night trying to figure it out.